Maria Laura Garcia
Jon Steward, the former host of The Daily Show, which is his most famous work so far, who has also written tons of books like for example Naked Pictures of Famous People, which reached New York Times Best Seller list in 1999, and it’s pretty much liked by everyone and anyone, if you think that you don’t like him, you should take a look at his 9/11 speech in the daily show and cry like you are cutting onions.
Because we know how awesome he is, we’ve brought you everything that Jon Steward has nailed:
“It’s not religion , it’s extremism, it’s the people that you know that want to loose a little weight and the next thing you know they are in the fucking hospital because they weight 65 pounds”
“You know what I mean? It’s people that just are dancing too close to the edge and the need for them is so great”
“Like for example, you have a beard, you have a delightful beard, a moderate beard a beard that says I’m hip I enjoy having a beard, it’s nice to touch, you don’t have a BEARD.”
“Like this motherfuckers, you must have a beard, what that you tie to your shoelaces? no, but these people, like the choices they make, THEY MAKE!”
“The middle east was always the middle east, it’s not like 50 years ago that they are sitting around playing UNO.”
“I think now that the idea that somehow these extremist and this violent acts are the product of a policy that initiated in this country, it’s like saying jeez why can’t black people just sit down and understand where the klan is coming from?”
“Like how is it that we did something and then they went and blow it up and then we really have to do some soul searching? yeah, why did we build those towers so high? that was fucking ridiculous. We put it right in the way of those planes they were hijacking.”
“I don’t want people to share anything with me that isn’t explicitly necessary for this situation, I really don’t, I don’t want to know why they are smiling like fucking retarded people, I don’t want to know”
“I don’t wanna know that the inner light that they found blinds them from the inside, I really don’t care like I’m reading, I’m reading on the plane I don’t wanna know, and I mean that in the best possible way”
“People that need to share their happiness with you, it’s not real happiness it’s that kind of happiness that comes from “I don’t want to kill myself anymore want to know why?” no I don’t want to know why you wanted to kill yourself in the first place. In fact, I probably preferred it if you have done it “
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